Because, first of all, how last decade, right? Plus, I am very conflicted about the whole re-embarking on the Weight Watchers thing! I’m a big fan of a lot of fat-acceptance blogs and the Health At Any Size movement. I am, in fact, counting on the things I’ve learned from those blogs to keep me from becoming an insufferable, points-counting maniac. I have no desire to provide aid and comfort to the thinspiration crowd (for obvious reasons, but can I just say, “thinspriation”? Seriously? That is a terrible word to just make up and inflict on people! Knock it off!)

However, it seems that without a bit of structure to my eating, I continuously have to buy new pants — pretty much one of my least-favorite activities. And I am in my 40s now, which is apparently the decade of Weird Health Things Occurring for No Discernible Reason. It is entirely possible that changing my food and exercise habits will have no effect on this whatsoever, but I figured I’d give it a shot before going to the doctor and dealing with my horrible insurance company.

So. Those are my tortured (and conflicted!) reasons for trying this out again. And that’s all I’ll say about that. I’m not going to be posting my weight, or before-and-after pictures, or any of that stuff. I imagine that most of the time, I will get distracted and not even post about food, which (topic sentence! finally!) is what I want to write about.

See, I really like to cook. And I’m getting pretty good at it! While I have no desire to become an insufferable points-counter, as stated above, I totally aspire to being an insufferable foodie. (I live in San Francisco, which puts me about halfway there already.)

And today, when I rejoined Weight Watchers Online and started browsing some of the recipes, I got so, so sad. Non-stick spray! Fucking Splenda! The titular fat-free cheese! I do not want to put these things in my mouth. Also, I am responsible for most of the cooking in this household, the other half of which almost certainly does not want to eat those things. (Although he also eats McDonald’s once a week, on purpose. So it’s not like he can get too uppity on that front.)

So I figure I will mess around with different recipes, and write them down here. I never write anything down when I am cooking, and then when I make something delicious, it can’t be replicated. (One tomato sauce in particular that has been lost to history in this manner would make you weep, had you been here to taste it.)

Wow. This is a lot of words. How about I just write down what I made tonight and then go watch some Angel on Netflix?

Spaghetti Squash and Chickpea Thing

• 1 medium-ish spaghetti squash (It ended up making about 3 cups. I just ordered a kitchen scale because I do everything Cooks Illustrated tells me, so these measurements will be better in the future.)
• 1 15-ounce can of tomato sauce
• 1 can of chickpeas
• Minced garlic (I ended up with about a tablespoon, but this is something everyone should decide for themselves.)
• 1 bay leaf
• Dried oregano (About a teaspoon, but again, do what you want!)
• 1 teaspoon of olive oil (More, if your pans are not non-stick, I’d think.)

Pre-heat the oven to 350 degrees, then cut the squash in half, scrape out the seeds, stab the outside a bunch of times with a fork, and roast it face down on a baking sheet covered in parchment paper. (Parchment paper is the best. Do you think I need to wash that baking sheet now? Ha!) The recipes I found online said to roast for 30-40 minutes. I did 35, but I think 40 might’ve been better.

Once it’s roasted, let it cool a bit, then use a fork to scrape out the strings of squash into a bowl or whatever. The cutting board is fine if you don’t feel like dirtying another dish.

In a frying pan, heat up the oil, throw in the garlic for 30 seconds or so, then dump in the tomato sauce and chickpeas (drain those first). Throw in the oregano and bay leaf, and let it simmer for a bit. (See. This is what I’m talking about. Not sure exactly how long the simmering was — say 5 or 10 minutes? Longer is probably better, so that things meld and get tasty.)

Throw in the squash, and then mix it all together, and let it go another 15 minutes or so, until it’s all warmed through. At this point, I tasted it and threw in a pinch or two of sea salt.

I’d say this makes 4 servings of about 1 cup and a little extra each. That’s how much I ate before I got full anyway (chickpeas are dense little suckers).

Verdict: Some weight-loss types will tell you that spaghetti squash is a good substitute for actual spaghetti. I’d say that’s a fucking lie. I still quite enjoyed it, but at first I was all, “Hmm, this texture is weird.” And it is weird if you are expecting spaghetti and not, you know, squash. Which is what it fucking is. Why lie? Squash is a perfectly nice food! 

Plus, I was happy that I figured out what to do with the squash and didn’t throw it out, which would’ve left me wracked with guilt. So there’s that!